


What Makes Me Happiest is You (Ten Valentine's Day Drabbles)

by tsuristyle



Category: SMAP
Genre: M/M, bubble baths, failing at S&M, fights that turn into makeouts, talking about your bandmates' love lives during sex, the difference a name makes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-24
Updated: 2016-12-24
Packaged: 2018-09-11 17:30:55
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,640
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9000139
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tsuristyle/pseuds/tsuristyle
Summary: Valentine drabbles! All pairings, some comedy, some fluff, some angst.1. in which kimura doesn't quite manage this s&m thing (kimugoro, r)2. the push and pull from heaven to hell (shingoro, pg-13)3. the best things in life are bubble baths and best friends (shintsuyo, pg)4. at the end of the road (nakatsu, g)5. tear you apart to see what's inside (2tops, r)6. if we can't be (with) them (nakagoro, g)7. the proper naming of things (gorotsu, g)8. after all the storm settles (kimutsu, g)9. pretty please with a cherry on top (shintaku, r)10. meet you halfway there (nakashingo, g)(Written February 2014.)





	

1\. in which kimura doesn't quite manage this s&m thing (kimugoro, r)  
  
"You want me to do _what_?" Kimura stares down into the bag. There's a whip, a pair of handcuffs, and a lot of other things he's not sure he wants to be able to recognize.  
  
"Punish me," Goro repeats, leaning against his side and nuzzling his ear. "I've been a _very bad boy_."  
  
Kimura turns his head to kiss his bandmate, tugging him closer. "Time to teach you a _lesson_ , then."  
  
The first time he tries to use the whip, he knocks over a lamp several feet behind him.  
  
The second time, he gets it tangled around his ankle.  
  
The third time, he nearly hits himself in the face.  
  
Kimura throws the whip down with a smack of leather on Goro's hardwood floor. "Fuck it," he growls, and grabs his handcuffed bandmate roughly by the hips. "I prefer you _naughty_ anyway."

 

2\. the push and pull from heaven to hell (shingoro, pg-13)  
  
"I don't want to sleep with you," Goro says, pressed against Shingo, one arm around his shoulders like he's going to kiss him.  
  
"Then why are you here?" Shingo wants to kiss him. He knows Goro-chan doesn't want to kiss him, though. Goro-chan hates him.  
  
Shingo hates him, too, but right now he really wants to kiss him.  
  
"Really I just want you to fuck me," Goro breathes. He pulls Shingo closer.  
  
"Me too," Shingo murmurs back. Maybe one of these times, they'll actually tell the truth.

 

3\. the best things in life are bubble baths and best friends (shintsuyo, pg)  
  
They're not having sex yet.  
  
Sure, they kiss and hug and cuddle and all, but it's never gotten any farther because Tsuyoshi blushes and mumbles excuses and that's that. Shingo wishes he'd just relax.  
  
So, instead: "Let's take a bath together."  
  
Tsuyoshi stares at him, red already starting to creep onto his cheeks. "A _bath_?"  
  
"A bath," Shingo repeats, tugging his bandmate towards the shower room. "Do you want bubbles or no bubbles?"  
  
Ten minutes and an impromptu waterfight later, they tumble into the bubble-filled tub and Tsuyoshi's laughing too much to complain when Shingo pulls him over to sit in front of him. "Like this?" Tsuyoshi asks, leaning back against him.  
  
"Like this." Shingo gently settles his arms around his bandmate's chest. Tsuyoshi's still a little tense, but the heat makes him grow heavier and heavier until he's tilting his head back to rest against Shingo's shoulder.  
  
"This is nice," Tsuyoshi murmurs after a long while, lifting one foot to poke his toes up through the bubbles.  
  
Shingo mirrors the movement, wiggling his toes, and kisses his bandmate's wet hair. "Yeah." They're not having sex yet, but he's not worried. Some things are more important.

 

4\. at the end of the road (nakatsu, g)  
  
It's always been an uneasy balance; Nakai's never admitted it, and Tsuyoshi's never acknowledged it. They've never had the courage to do anything more.  
  
But now, as Tsuyoshi rides home from the last day of filming, a bundle of flowers in one arm and three months of dying lingering in his too-skinny frame, it's time to finally do something. He's faced everything in his life as Nakamura Hideo; now he's ready to face everything in his life as Kusanagi Tsuyoshi.  
  
It's funny, he thinks as the scent of the flowers drifts up to him, that he should have to face death in order to face love. But maybe that's just what it takes to see what you really have.  
  
"Take me to Nakai-kun's," he tells his manager, and leans close to the window to watch the road go by.

 

5\. tear you apart to see what's inside (2tops, r)  
  
It starts with a push, a pull, a yank, a shove, nails turning inward to tear at clothes if only because they can't tear at skin. Nakai remembers the feeling of leaving deep scratches across Kimura's cheek, how satisfying it was. _You deserve this,_ he'd thought, even as he'd helped Kimura clean the blood away.  
  
Scratching is out. Hitting is okay if it doesn't leave a mark. Hair-pulling is okay, like the way Nakai grabs a blind handful of carefully-styled locks and yanks until his bandmate hisses in pain. Kimura twists away and grabs his collar, slamming him back into the wall. That's okay, too.  
  
They glare at each other, breathing hard, and Kimura kisses him.  
  
They're not sure if this part is okay yet. Nakai thinks that wouldn't stop them anyway.

 

6\. if we can't be (with) them (nakagoro, g)  
  
The first time they do it is frustrated and quick, a wordless temporary breakdown of barriers because Nakai needs _someone_ he's allowed to have and Goro knows exactly what that's like.  
  
The second time, Nakai is drunk. "He won't get out of my head," he tells Goro, collapsing through the younger man's hotel room door. Goro kisses him. It doesn't help him forget any, but it does make it hurt less.  
  
He thinks about it off and on, like it's some kind of weird charm to protect him from his own thoughts. It makes it easier to breathe, somehow. He wonders if Goro has something to help him breathe, too.  
  
The third time, he rings Goro's doorbell and hands him a rose. "I'm not him," he says, still turning the words over carefully in his head. "But maybe I could just be me."  
  
It's the sappiest thing Nakai's ever done, but Goro looks down at the rose and nods slowly and smiles like he can't tell if he's going to laugh or cry. "If you don't mind that I'm just me," he says, and leads Nakai into his apartment.

 

7\. the proper naming of things (gorotsu, g)  
  
"Goro-san," Tsuyoshi calls him, asking him if he's seen Shingo's new movie yet.  
  
"Goro-san," he whispers, when their fingers brush for the thousandth time and Goro finally slips a hand into his in the dark of the theater.  
  
"Goro-san," he breathes, when their eyes catch, the movie forgotten, leaning towards each other over the armrest.  
  
Goro doesn't know when he stopped being _Goro-chan_. Maybe Tsuyoshi thought it sounded childish, and _Goro-san_ is some well-meaning but misguided attempt to be grown-up and considerate and respectful. Goro doesn't mind if Tsuyoshi wants to be grown-up and considerate, but he doesn't want Tsuyoshi's _respect_. Respect is too far apart.  
  
"It's _Goro_ ," he breathes back, and leans in to close the distance.

 

8\. after all the storm settles (kimutsu, g)  
  
It really shouldn't work, Tsuyoshi thinks, peeking over his book to watch Kimura watch TV. They're as different as fire and water, they ought to have been completely incompatible, or at least incredibly unhealthy together. When Kimura had kissed him, that first, rough, demanding kiss, Tsuyoshi had been knee-meltingly happy but he honestly hadn't expected anything good to come of it.  
  
He _certainly_ hadn't expected to end up sharing an apartment.  
  
Kimura shifts, dislodging Tsuyoshi's leg from his lap in order to sit cross-legged on the couch. "You wanna cook tonight?"  
  
Tsuyoshi sticks his leg across Kimura's lap again when he seems settled. "Not really."  
  
"Lazy ass." Kimura swats his knee, and then tugs Tsuyoshi's other leg up to join the first. He rests his arms across them like a pillow. "Me neither. Pizza?"  
  
"Pizza," Tsuyoshi agrees, wiggling his toes. It hadn't been easy, of course. They'd had to fight and say things they weren't good at saying, and they'd had to _trust_ each other. It had probably been the hardest thing either of them had ever done.  
  
But right here, warm and comfortable and ordinary together, Tsuyoshi knows they'd both do it all over again in a heartbeat.

 

9\. pretty please with a cherry on top (shintaku, r)  
  
"No."  
  
"Please?"  
  
" _No_."  
  
"I'll be careful, I promise!"  
  
"Absolutely not."  
  
"But--"  
  
Kimura shoves Shingo off and rolls on top of him instead. "You are not topping, and that's _final_."  
  
Shingo pouts. "I bet you'd let Nakai-kun top you."  
  
"Would _not_ ," Kimura mutters, tugging Shingo's belt open. "Not unless he begged on his hands and knees."  
  
"But then you _would_." Shingo grins triumphantly. "You guys're so fucked up."  
  
"At least he wouldn't make a habit of discussing his bandmates' love lives during sex," Kimura grumbles, and sticks his hand down Shingo's pants. "Now shut up and I'll show you what _fucked up_ really means."

 

10\. meet you halfway there (nakashingo, g)  
  
"Hey."  
  
Shingo blinks in the dark. "Yeah?"  
  
"Is this enough for you?"  
  
On the other half of the bed, Nakai is on his side, his back turned. The heat and smell of them still lingers on the sheets between them, though by the time Shingo wakes up it'll have faded and Nakai will be gone for another week, maybe two.  
  
Of course it's not enough.  
  
Shingo wants to go to sleep curled together, his arms around Nakai in that warm space between them. He wants to see Nakai every day, even if they'd run out of things to talk about and pick pointless fights to drive each other crazy. He wants Nakai to laugh more, smile more, talk more, and at least not turn his back to Shingo like this, like he doesn't want to look at him anymore.  
  
But he knows Nakai is trying.  
  
Nakai turns, looking over at him. "I can't promise you anything, you know. I just--" Something shifts under the sheets between them. "I want you to be happy."  
  
Shingo stretches his hand out to catch Nakai's, weaving their fingers together in the lingering heat. Maybe in the morning Nakai will be gone, but right now he's here, and he's trying as hard as he can to stay here. "That's what makes me happiest of all," Shingo says, and he honestly means it.  
  
He's going to try as hard as he can, too.


End file.
